First Call to GP!!

Adam had started to pooh BRIGHT green. I looked that up on the internet, and it said not to worry. Then there was some mucus as well. So I rang the GP.

I could hear the ‘Oh God, another first time mum panicking’ in the GPs voice, but he was very nice and assured me it was fine. Nothing to worry about. But if it was still that way on Monday, to call and they’d see him.

Hey, I think one call in 3 weeks is not so bad!!!

I just wish my GP, who is also Adam’s, had been in. She wouldn’t have had that in her voice. And she’d be so pleased to hear about him.

July 1, 2009 Posted in: Adam No Comments

Okay, So…

I have joined the irrational worry mummy’s club. The dues are low, but the stress is high.

You see, I put Adam to bed around 2300 last night. And woke up myself at 230 in a blind panic because he hadn’t woken up. Cue much frantic feeling of tummy for breathing. He was fine, just asleep. Mummy was then awake for several hours. Adam woke up for food at 4am. I could have slept for 4.5 - 5 hours in a row! Silly mummy.

And then wouldn’t settle all morning, except in my arms. My mum finally took him after lunch and I got 3 hours of sleep. And now daddy is home looking after him. Because he wouldn’t settle for my mum either.

Just another day with a newborn!!

June 29, 2009 Posted in: Adam One Comment

First Truly Bad Day with Adam…

He just would not settle any where but my arms all.day.long. Not in his Amby, not in his cot, no where. Man do my arms hurt. And I am very tired.

I’ve just gotten him to lie down for the first time all day without being in someone’s arms.

I am sure there will be many many more days like today. He is, after all, only 2 weeks and 1 day old. But I think the first one is the hardest.

Really, people have been having babies for millions of years. Shouldn’t they come with instruction manuals by now?

June 26, 2009 Posted in: Adam 2 Comments

Some Responses and Other Stuff…

Hazel - That is actually a cardi the SCBU had. I have no idea if it was actually hand knit!

Anna - Various people were being very agressive about getting my milk to come in. But Adam is thriving on Cow and Gate. And that’s all that matters.

In other stuff…I just found out that a very good friend of mine, an ex-lover in fact, died last year. Ron and I were together for about a year. He was 26 years older than me. He was a gentleman through and through.

RIP Ron. You will be missed. And BTW, in case you missed it…I had my fat happy baby.

June 25, 2009 Posted in: Thoughts One Comment

In About 40 Minutes From When I Write This Sentence

Adam will be exactly 2 weeks old.

So, how’s he doing?

Very well.

He’s eating well, he’s sleeping 2 - 4 hours at a stretch, he’s awake and alert for about an hour in between.

He’s gaining weight.

He’s getting cuter by the second!

He is mummy and daddy’s wee dote.

I’ll have some new pictures up soon!!

June 25, 2009 Posted in: Adam, daily 3 Comments

If Anyone is Looking for Pictures

All pics will be at Simon’s Flickr. Cuz he was home and started uploading them there!

And videos are at his YouTube.

June 24, 2009 Posted in: daily No Comments

Breastfeeding…

So, I wanted to breastfeed my son. Not just because of all of the ‘breast is best’ propaganda around these days, but because it seems like a lovely way to feed a baby. All that snuggling and skin on skin contact while giving my son his very best start, what could be bad with that?

So from the start, my very first appointment with a midwife, they asked me how I intended to feed my baby. And I always answered, with no hesitation ‘breast’. I knew there could be issues, that the art, if you will, of breast feeding has been lost some where along the way but that millions of women were doing it. And I really wanted to.

And then he was born. And wouldn’t even do a first feed in recovery due to his breathing. And then he taken away from me within hours to be put in SCBU. So I started hand expressing and did get a few milliliters of colostrum for him. Which he took through a tube.

And then I got an electric pump while I was in hospital. And I hooked myself up, every 3 hours, including round the clock. And still only got a few drops.

So I started on the wives tales. Fennel Tea. Lactation Cookies. More expressing. Sitting looking at him. Smelling him.

And still I never expressed more than about 10 ml every 3 hours. Not even close to enough to feed my hungry son, who by the end of his first week was up to 60 - 90 ml (90 ml is about 3 oz) every 3 - 4 hours. My milk has just never come in.

And so I made the decision. Cow and Gate via bottle. I cried and agonized over this decision. I fretted and worried. What kind of mother can’t feed her son?

And then I realized I could feed my son. I know formula isn’t the same as breast milk, no matter what it says on the tin. But its keeping his tummy full. And he is very healthy, according to the Health Visitor who was around yesterday. And he’s content (well, as content as an 11 day old baby ever is ).

What really angers me is other people’s reactions. I’m sorry if to you I’m not a complete Mummy because I am not breastfeeding. But when eating time becomes a battle of wills? Not good for Mummy or Baby.

And it angers me the lack of support that some women show other women for their choices. For their failures, if you will. There are no pefect mummies. Everyone makes choices for their children. And all over the world women judge other women for those choices.

And the judging is not just over breast versus bottle. Its disposable versus reusable. Public school versus home schooling. Free Range versus total watching.

And none of these issue, and many others, have a right or a wrong answer. And yet we all judge each other about them every day. And it needs to stop.

We are all mummies together. We all have one common goal, to raise our kids to be the very best human beings they can be, or I hope that is the overall goal for all mummies. I know it is my goal!

And if it isn’t your goal? I can respect that. And support you in that.

Can you do the same for me?

June 23, 2009 Posted in: Being a Mummy, Thoughts, daily 9 Comments

My Micracle Occured…

Not only did he come home a week earlier than the doctors predicted, he came home a day earlier than I was told!

Adam and I came home yesterday around 2:30pm.

He is doing super. He had a great night in his Amby next to Mummy and Daddy’s bed, sleeping from about 11:45 to 4:45. He probably would have slept longer, but Mummy woke up and got a bit panicked that he was still asleep so she grabbed him to make sure he was still breathing! He was.

Right now he is asleep again, in his cot. Mummy and Daddy decided Amby is for overnight and cot is for during the day. Seems to be working so far.

He’s eating like a champ, from a bottle. We are having some breast feeding issues. I will be blogging about those in full later.

And now…the moment a lot of people have been waiting for…Adam Jacob Fraser…UNPLUGGED!!!!!

June 21, 2009 Posted in: Adam, daily No Comments

He Took A Bottle All Night Long

no need to reinsert his feeding tube. So I am hoping we can bring him home on Sunday.

Look! Clothes!!!!

In other, non-Adam news, my mom is here. She arrived on Wednesday and immediately started cleaning my toaster. Ahhh, mothers.

It is really good to have her and Step Dad here. It is so helpful to know Simon and I can be at the hospital with Adam and come home and there’s some food in the fridge and the laundry is folded. It will be just as helpful once Adam is home, if not more so.

Of course, she makes me a little nutsy (and yes, she’s probably going to read this) as she asks me about my blood sugar 10x a day. In fact I just told her it was 1000.10. Just to be a wise ass.

As for me, I am feeling very well. My tummy is getting less sore every day. Every time my wound gets checked it looks fine.

I just wish my baby was with me. I’d be exhausted. But he’d be here and not across town. Soon.

June 19, 2009 Posted in: Adam, daily 2 Comments